tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post2848149725776739577..comments2024-03-17T12:13:33.772-04:00Comments on Betrayed Wives' Club: How "It Could Be Worse" Keeps You StuckEllehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13470499558973726796noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-85890431304616958102015-05-06T13:01:32.024-04:002015-05-06T13:01:32.024-04:00Sometimes, hearing someone say, "I'm sorr...Sometimes, hearing someone say, "I'm sorry that happened to you. It really sucks!" can actually help me to move on. I feel validated.<br /><br />~GeeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-38289394259488022442011-07-06T13:52:05.651-04:002011-07-06T13:52:05.651-04:00Infidelity Rage,
Glad you found us! Love your sit...Infidelity Rage,<br />Glad you found us! Love your site, too. <br /><br />ElleEllehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13470499558973726796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-54318303239870847302011-07-05T07:14:52.601-04:002011-07-05T07:14:52.601-04:00Hey!
I just found your blog. LOVE this post. You ...Hey!<br /><br />I just found your blog. LOVE this post. You are so right about looking at the positives when you are basically in hell. Right now, I usually tell myself that at least my husband didn't leave me for his slut. Some days I tell myself it may have been easier if he did...but I know deep down that it probably wouldn't have been, especially with two kids. Thanks for giving me this insight today - I will definitely keep it in mind. Oh and if you want, I have a blog too. ;-)-https://www.blogger.com/profile/08428710376731969342noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-30005213521022150612011-07-01T23:28:43.193-04:002011-07-01T23:28:43.193-04:00It's amazing how frequently we minimize our pa...It's amazing how frequently we minimize our pain...or do anything we can to avoid feeling it. It seems, to many of us, like it will be tsunami-sized, completely engulfing us. Yet often, the opposite happens. When we don't talk ourselves out of it and simply feel it, it can be like a small wave washing over us that then recedes, leaving us sad, perhaps, but not destroyed. We can start with little things – like acknowledging the hurt we feel when a friend cancels a lunch date or some such, then work our way up to the big stuff. It seems counterintuitive – yet feeling the pain is often far easier on us than pushing it away.Ellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13470499558973726796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-46856341783294906222011-06-29T21:22:39.036-04:002011-06-29T21:22:39.036-04:00I was talking with my therapist shortly after the ...I was talking with my therapist shortly after the earthquake/tsunami/nuke disaster in Japan and I said "Well, things could be worse, I could be in Japan." She gave me a look and said, "We aren't in Japan." It was permission to admit my situation sucked and I had a right to feel my pain if I wanted to.Pippinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-6956707326603243572011-06-28T10:01:08.434-04:002011-06-28T10:01:08.434-04:00I remember someone on Oprah once saying "you ...I remember someone on Oprah once saying "you don't need to have a horrible marriage to want a better one." So frequently, we think that if we ask for – or even want – more, we're somehow ungrateful for what we have. Truth is, we can have gratitude for what we have...while still working for better. I'm grateful my kids are healthy and whole...but that doesn't stop me from wanting them to pick their dirty clothes off the floor...and working toward that end.<br />I think, after betrayal, it often feels like an "all or nothing" proposition. After such a trust violation, we expect either the perfect remorseful husband...or a total bum who will never change. <br />Yet any marriage is a matter of negotiation – or sorting through needs and wants and reaching a relationship that works for both.<br />And that's particularly challenging when there's such pain following betrayal.<br />Kudos to you for saying "enough"...and working to create a relationship that allows you to ask for what you need.Ellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13470499558973726796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-90819054499300758132011-06-28T06:33:54.003-04:002011-06-28T06:33:54.003-04:00Your analogy about the mud struck a chord.
Over t...Your analogy about the mud struck a chord.<br /><br />Over the last couple of years I've come to the conclusion that I'm no longer willing to put up with things that don't work or make me unhappy - and that includes aspects of my relationship with my husband.<br /><br />I suppose part of it is me sticking two fingers up at fate and daring it to throw something else at me.FoolishWomanhttp://www.foolishwoman.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.com