tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post4794192123868596161..comments2024-03-17T12:13:33.772-04:00Comments on Betrayed Wives' Club: Say It Out LoudEllehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13470499558973726796noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-35070109722043968432015-05-07T12:26:50.730-04:002015-05-07T12:26:50.730-04:00I lived out loud. I brought up my fears to my husb...I lived out loud. I brought up my fears to my husband constantly. When he told me to be patient about the fact that we had basically no sex life (thank you, porn addiction), I yelled at him, "How long must I wait? It's been 12 f***ing years!" That got him to make an effort...for about 3 days.<br /><br />He didn't change until he really wanted to change. Until he was willing to admit he had an addiction and to go and get professional help for it. I've had to realize now that there really was nothing I could have done. I could have thrown all the tantrums I wanted, I could have left. Going from full-blown porn addict (and eventually real-life cheating) to recovering addict was up to him, and no one else.<br /><br />~GeeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-79531441865765329782011-07-13T17:11:25.480-04:002011-07-13T17:11:25.480-04:00H'mmm indeed. Today we fired a house painter w...H'mmm indeed. Today we fired a house painter who gave me that "h'mmm" feeling. Couldn't put my finger on it...but we let him go because, despite months of various workers in my home, he was the only one who made me uncomfortable. To be truthful, I tried to talk myself out of it, if only because I thought to myself "he knows where we live, he knows the house..." but the fact that I was almost afraid of letting him go should have been reason enough to let him go.<br />Life exhausts me sometimes...Ellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13470499558973726796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-40223534872102889812011-07-13T16:02:45.198-04:002011-07-13T16:02:45.198-04:00If you watch(ed) Oprah, she talks about that littl...If you watch(ed) Oprah, she talks about that little voice that makes you say "Hmmmm?" I had a lot of those "Hmmmms?" while my husband was having his affair but I would silence them because going 'there' and I mean really 'going there' was way too terrifying. And, there was no way he was cheating because he wasn't staying out late or calling or texting all the time. But, he was going to her apartment at lunch. At lunch!!!???!!! Not sure I would have ever figured that out. It just didn't occur to me that a lunch affair was a possibility.<br /><br />Oprah also talks about how the universe will try to tell you something -- first with a whisper and if you don't listen it tries harder and harder and louder and louder until you can no longer ignore it. I could no longer ignore it on Dday but, to tell the truth, I did try. I tried really hard with the bargaining and the denial even though in my heart/soul I knew the truth even before Dday.<br /><br />I've vowed never again to silence my "Hmmmms" and to listen closely when the Universe whispers.<br /><br />ps -- I love that quote.Pippinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-51873464968430596222011-07-13T11:57:24.561-04:002011-07-13T11:57:24.561-04:00Yeah...I hear ya. In many cases, we're not goi...Yeah...I hear ya. In many cases, we're not going to stop anything...but by at least speaking our fears out loud, we're not lying to ourselves about them. I often believe the worst betrayal is that of ourselves. I know I did the best I could (and still do) but I frequently (still) let myself down by trying too hard and silencing the voice inside until it's screaming.Ellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13470499558973726796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7026450255174007652.post-91366283000886334172011-07-12T23:20:23.592-04:002011-07-12T23:20:23.592-04:00It dose not help.
I have lived out loud and plus ...It dose not help. <br />I have lived out loud and plus some from the beginning with my husband. I make no secrets of what I want, like or don't like. I don't play guessing games and I have little patience for waiting for things so I bring them up myself.<br />Still here I am...Martihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02466370118453904316noreply@blogger.com