I haven't yet read her newly released autobiography From This Moment On. Part of me is tired of all the books on cheating I've read. Part of me is tired about hearing of cheating. Good Lord, doesn't any married man keep his damn pants on these days.
However, so much of what Shania has said about discovering the affair – "I really was completely shocked... I didn't want to kill myself, but I didn't want to live" – was exactly how I, and many others, felt. Nothing protected her from the pain – not her beauty, her career, her money. She, like so many of us, desperately wanted to fill in the blanks, something neither her husband nor her friend, with whom he was having the affair, would do. "By...not knowing the details," she explains, "your imagination is left to run wild."
I give Shania Twain credit for sharing her story with the world. It can only help those of us who know her pain intimately to feel part of a wider community of women with the strength to get past such betrayal.
Now, if only I could write a hit-making country song about it....
I'd like to thank you for your blog posts. I don't think I am grateful enough for them - In fact I know I'm not. I don't like some of what your views are, but when you stay on topic (how dare I - it's your darned blog and I'm only a visitor - but I'm totally 100% honest - a downfall in my case - foot in mouth syndrome) your post is 100% on and 100% tactful. I don't get that bad taste in my mouth like I do when I read another blog which shall not be mentioned in title. And I'd like to thank you for keeping your blog about you and your husband and totally understanding that it was YOUR husband that you were married to - not the other woman. I can't stand it when I read about how the other woman owes anything to someone else's marriage. They just do not - ever. No one owes you anything - except if they said vows or led you to believe they were not cheating on you or that they are faithful. That is what your partner owes you and that is it - if the partner tells you something then they owe it to you not to lie about it. They don't owe you anything else. But that is the biggest part.
ReplyDeleteWhenever I read about the OW or her family or blaming her or her family or getting her family involved or friends or work or whoever and everyone saying that it is fine and good to do it and the OW deserves all the fury or that the wife has done nothing wrong in trying to ruin the OW or her family or especially when the wife actually does believes whole heartedly that she has done nothing wrong, really, because she was after all in trauma - I want to scream!!!! Yes, you have done great wrong. And everyone else who is cheering you on has done great wrong. Your husband has done great wrong to you, possibly to the other woman - in making her believe things that were not true (how do I know my husband is lying..his lips are moving) and you, my dear wives who blame anyone outside of your marriage and do things or say things to them that are hurtful or life changing, are wrong.
And that's what I like about your posts. You want to confront - you want to blame - you want power over another person like you believe they had power over you. But you know - you totally know - that the only person who harmed you was your husband. And that is pure honesty.
Complete and utter honesty. It's so rare, I just wanted to point it out to you in clarity - even if I use examples of how others are not - I wanted you to see that others (me) see how clearly you understand betrayal. And that is why your blog is good.
Thank-you. I really appreciate your words. And your honesty.
DeleteElle