Monday, April 4, 2016

Another Round of Stupid S#*t Cheaters Say

At the request of Lynn Less Pain, I'm once again asking you to share the incredibly stupid s#*t that cheaters say. For instance, my husband, responding once to my accusation that he was a "liar", defended himself by telling me he's never once lied to a business client. Seriously. Like the fact that in business he was a martyr somehow negated the years (and years) of lying he did to me. WTF?
There are plenty of other WTF experiences here for you to shake your head at and laugh. Because what choice do we have right? We can laugh at these idiots or cry. Today I choose to laugh. I hope you do too.
Have at 'er ladies!

105 comments:

  1. "Well at least I told you... I could have easily not told you."

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    1. Here's a good one: "I was repressed and didn't want to share my fantasy a with you for fear of rejection. So I repressed them so much they became reality." I call bulldhit on that one as I have shared my more pervie fantasies with HIM.

      Delete
    2. "I didn't have to lie to her, she knows I talk to you"
      WTF? dip shit

      Delete
    3. yes, I got that one as well. After asking him to tell me when they communicate (because if I use a specific term, like text, he won't tell me if it's an email); he waits about 2 months and tells me she texted him asking who he was with at lunch...."but I told you, I thought that would be positive" UGH!

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  2. My husband and I were having an argument and he brought up how he missed a meeting for a charity club he belongs to to help him with his work reputation. He reminded me how he missed a meeting to show that our family came first (my daughter and I were having conflicts so he stayed home to help deal with that.) He said, "I know how this sounds, but I do have my integrity. I said I'd help with X, and I like to keep my word." Yeah... apparently that integrity doesn't spill over into his personal life. Only when it affects his career.
    ~S

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    Replies
    1. S,
      Sorta like my husband's "I've never lied to a client" defence. Give me a break.

      Delete
  3. I submit for your consideration......

    "You told me to do it!",
    "I did it for US!" and
    "I thought if I took my needs elsewhere we could stay together!"

    He imagined that I at some point said this was the solution to his not getting the kind/frequency of sex he desired. It never occurred to his entitled mind to put effort into the relationship stuff I asked him for over the years. After all, he had a job, I was completely out of line to ask for anything more until he got the sex and gratitude he deserved!!

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    Replies
    1. Wow, what a hero. He didn't WANT to cheat...he did it to make your marriage BETTER. Of course!

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    2. OMFG.... Is there a handbook with this crap? Mine used the same logic. The standout: It's not emotional, it's just sex. Just like brushing your teeth.

      Delete
  4. In the midst of TT and trying to make me believe they did not have sex....

    My WH tells me that "Fat Greased Pig"(OW) is "one of the most religious people he's ever known and she wouldn't swear to God if it wasn't true"

    Oh my! I lost my shit!! I was like, "let's discuss how religious she is!! Do you know one of the few things punishable by death in the Bible.....ADULTERY! Do you know the one and only one thing in the Bible that God allows for divorce?....Yep! You guessed it! ADULTERY!" I laid into him! How dare he bring up her "moral high ground" as a defense! I am a shitty Christian, but any day of the year I am a better Christian than she will ever be! She's not a Christian, she's a F#%&ing HYPOCRITE!

    A married woman with SIX KIDS, carrying on and acting a fool on Facebook messenger, drunk on 4 glasses of whine in the middle of the day & making out with my WH in her car in a cemetery while they groped every inch of each other!

    Yeah! Forgive me Lord for not taking the word of a fat, drunk, attention hungry, married whore!! Needless to say, I made my point and he retracted his statement and admitted to how ignorant he was to think it, let a lone say it to my face!! Ya think?!?!?!?!?!

    On a side note, we did get two polygraphs and it turns out there was no sex, but I only trusted the word of a professional and not the word of his Bible swearing whore!!

    The stupidity!!

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    1. The cheating whore my husband chose, was a married Sunday school teacher who had one little girl. She had been married before but was divorced due to his infidelity. I was shocked about some of the things that she immediately confided in him. He once told me that she told him she hoped her doctor could help stop the bleeding she was bothered with at the time. I couldn't believe what she had told him, why would anyone tell a male coworker such private things. He assured me that that was actually tame discussion. The woman he worked with talked about their sex life in detail and had no problems sharing very personal details. My husband used to tell me funny shocking comments that she said at work, like, " hurry up hooker"... Once she sent him a text that he forwarded to me( I almost read it in class) when you clicked on it, it said, " I suck cock!" Loudly, over and over... When I heard it I was furious and said maybe I should send it on to her sweet husband.. To which my husband replied, send it! I was just being an uptight bitch ruining their fun,( yes, other office ladies were involved) it was just a hilarious joke, I was not responding to the disrespect or hypocrisy that was a red flag and precursor to worse behavior... After all if they had something going on, why would he send it to me. He was a master of telling some things but hiding most, so that you were forced into what would seem like petty behavior if you didn't have every fact straight and then proof.. Fast forward to her having her poor husband call to check on us and pray for us because she had told him that we were having trouble after I tried to call and discuss things with her. I was painted as someone who was picking on her for some unknown reason. Happens to her quite often I hear. It of course wouldn't have anything to do with her screwing other people's husbands. It turns out that they actually bragged to one another about the fact that they had both cheated before.. He once told me that he almost called her one morning to tell her to slow her ass down when he,saw her speeding through town. I was incredulous and said, to let her husband talk to her about such things.He seemed to want me to like her as if that would somehow make it ok.. I saw a scratc on his arm, "she was kidding around with him at work" are you kidding me, are they 13! His boss made a comment that they were like a bunch of kids joking around on the elevator.. Of course he didn't know that after work they were doing drugs and using the office desk for sex.. My husband made fun of her voice, her fake beliefs, her makeup and hair. We called her spaceclown. Funny how she wasn't so distasteful to him after all. It is comforting to know that her and her current husband are praying for our marriage though..

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  5. Me: You actually asked me if you could go for a drink with whore under the guise of her having no friends / being new in the office / new to the area. You took advantage of my trusting relaxed nature and alleviated any minor sign of guilt you had but not actually lying about who you were with, just why you were with her. How is that compartmentalising? You didn't keep your 2 fucking worlds seperate then!
    Him: If you must know, she demanded I make an excuse and get over to hers.

    Once I had returned from storming out of the room I explained he sounded like a even more pathetic loser telling me that. God forbid you didn't jump as soon as your 22 year old whore told you to! Doh.

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  6. Bent not broken
    I laughed so hard my coke 0 almost sneezed through my nose! My h said the same thing about ow was a Christian and struggled with her decision to continue the affair she struggled through years of it! Lmfao and then during our how could you lie to me so easily he used the old I only lied by omission and if it makes it any better I lied way more to her than you! Still smh at that one!

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  7. During his trickle truth stage - he had some choice ones - The best was when I went to his computer one day and found a screenshot of a hotel reservation. I had never been there. ( it was most important to me as it was two weeks after the date which he said was their last sexual encounter ... Important for testing of STDs of course ). I took a picture of it with my phone and when he came home from work I asked him about it? Now, he had told me he had never spent the night with the OW ( and as I said the date was very important.). Anyway, when I asked him and showed him the picture of the screenshot… He simply froze and then looked at me and said I don't know what that is? And he ran away. Literally. Like suddenly he developed amnesia.
    The next day while he was at work of course I dug into the credit card records so I had more ammunition. When he came home he said he remembered about the hotel reservation. He confirmed that they met there had lunch and drinks and then exploded into World War III and stormed their separate ways. (This was during their break up phase.) I was able to confirm via text messages and phone records that in fact he was not there through the night. At the time I was so devastated, as I was with each of his "trickle truths" - yet it goes to show the fog, the idiocy, the crippling fear which had a hold of him. A photo of an email, found on his computer with his name, his phone number and his email address confirming a hotel reservation - and he doesn't know what it is? Lately when I'm pissed at him I refer to him as a Neanderthal. Bleeping Neanderthal.

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  8. "I knew that talking to another woman online and meeting her in real life was wrong, but I didn't realize it was cheating."

    Really?!

    Apparently he didn't count it as cheating until she actually touched him. He at least admits now that all of it was cheating, but the time, it sounded like he was trying to get himself off the hook because he "didn't know" it was cheating. Right...because people join a website intended to find affair partners because they AREN'T cheating. Maybe for the articles? Pffft.

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  9. A month past d-day, I accidentally backed over his bare toes with a rolling desk chair. I apologized profusely. "Are we even now?" he asked. "NO, we are not even now! You had unprotected sex with a crazy whore while wearing your wedding ring! WE WILL NEVER BE EVEN!" I roared back at him. It was our first laugh in weeks.

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  10. Thanks Elle for giving us time out to laugh.

    -On the way to our first therapy session he automatically turn left at the light which was the way to the OW's house instead of straight.
    - I loved you entire time.
    -I asked him if he gave her any other jewlery. He said No. A few weeks later he told me he gave her a watch. "I didn't think watch was jewelry."
    -Me picking her up for dinner in the truck was a mode of transportation only."
    -No I never took her to restaurant A. I just pick up lunch for us.
    -She was a terrible housekeeper.
    -I thought it was jock itch

    I'm sure I can think up more. Hope it makes someone smile at the crazy talk.

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  11. I can't stop myself

    I didn't think you would find out.
    I was getting the perfume for her, no you, I hadn't made up my mind.
    I didn't have any reason to stop
    OW: You didn't seem real to me until I met you
    I didn't penetrate her but it wasn't from a lack of trying

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  12. My husband had an affair while at a business seminar. After the affair was revealed, I discovered she was added as a contact on his LinkedIn page. I asked him to delete her. He found my request totally unreasonable and said, "But she is a business contact. I don't see anything wrong with her being on LinkedIn. Business contacts are important and I may need her to introduce me to other important contacts in the future. The affair was one thing, but business is something totally different."

    Considering that she was visiting his profile several times a day, her picture was plastered all over his profile page. I explained that having her picture looking at him every time he logged into LinkedIn was the same as having a picture of her on his desk.

    At the time he fought me but, finally gave in. However, doing the deed himself proved too difficult and he said, "If you want to ruin my business potential, than go ahead...YOU delete her." With that, he gave me his password and I deleted his very important "business" contact.

    His career has not suffered. :) Thankfully, he now realizes how deep in the fog he was at the time and how stupid it was to argue keeping her as a contact for business reasons.

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  13. 'I thought you didn't care' has anyone else had that one wtf really : (

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    1. I had this one too :(

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    2. Oh yeah, I've had that one. "But I thought you didn't like me anymore." Really? Did you think I was cheating on you? Because speaking from personal experience, I feel like that's a pretty strong sign. Maybe in the future, you could try something less drastic to determine my feelings for sure -- like say, actually talking to me. Argh.

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    3. I heard a similar one. "I thought you might understand my wanting to have a second life." Huh?

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    4. You didn't love me anymore. That's why I've said "I love you!" About 1,000 times a day for ten years. And made you cookies and brought you presents and made you dinner and stayed married to you for a decade. Because I didn't love you anymore. Eyes. Rolling b

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  14. I confronted him in the kitchen. I was hysterical. He was leaning with his back to the cupboard I threw my put my laptop in his face...it was on her facebook page...their vacation photos, holiday ( when he had to go see his aunt and uncle) photos...He sunk to the floor and said " why can't you just leave things alone" brilliant, as always it was my fault! He actually wanted me to close the laptop and forget about it..not a chance!

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  15. My husband's 'best' one after I found out about two affairs with the same ex girlfriend was "I wasn't really being unfaithful as it was somewhere I had been before"!

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  16. Said about his ho-worker:
    "Do you really think that if I was cheating on you I would continue to bring her into our home, around you and our kids?" "Is that the kind of man you think I am?" I backed right down. Because as a faithful spouse I couldn't imagine screwing someone and then parading them around my family, expecting my wife to entertain and befriend her and her husband. Too bad I didn't know the real answer to those questions! Yes, not only do I think you'd parade your whore in front of us, I think you'd screw her IN OUR HOME for a year. Yes. Yes you ARE that kind of man.

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    Replies
    1. Ho-worker...priceless

      My H always tried downplaying anaffair with anyone at work...I can't do that with my job, I could lose my job. Our daughter worked for him," like I'm going to do something that stupid with our daughter around" and the stupid ass did!

      Rachelle

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    2. LOL ho-worker! Never heard that one. Maybe it was a typo, but made me laugh -- in a crazy "I'm actually really truly in the Betrayed Wives Club because my husband had two ho-workers" sort of way.

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    3. Exercisegrace- how did you get through her being screwed in your home. My husband did the same thing and I struggle with it every day and moving isn't something we can do right now. I did get rid of the beds though!

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  17. He sdaid. "You don't understand what happens when you drink that much,It just happens" I said Falling off a bicycle, tripping over something just happens. Falling into vaginas with so many barflies does not just happen. Who are you kidding me or you?...
    SammyG

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    1. "Falling into vaginas". OMG!! I've been having a really rough day, lots of tears and that just made me laugh!!! Thank you! SammyG!

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    2. I made the bicycle/vagina comment to my H within days of finding out, he actually agreed with me when I put it that way.

      Rachelle

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  18. On his boundaries:
    I never saw on her on Thursday because you were home on Friday
    She asked me to come over in the afternoon but if her boyfriend was coming that evening, I didn't go.
    I felt uncomfortable when she came to the house
    She invited herself over to the house.
    She was separated so it was ok. I never considered her married.
    The last time we had sex was Sept but I got a blow job in Oct.

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    1. And she had a boyfriend!! My h's OW got a boyfriend in the end too and apparently it was fine with her to see the boyfriend and my h and for my h to stay married to me (oh. and she was still married to her husband after being separated for two years!). One big happy fucking family - problem is, some of us didn't know about the other family members!

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  19. I love how these women are SUCH GOOD people! I remember him telling me that she was such a kind and caring person who was always helping people. He knows how much I value this so he was selling how great she was to me. lol

    I had to spell it out for him... trying to steal him was an intensely hurtful and uncaring way to treat ME. She was trying to take away the man I loved. What could be more hurtful?? He said he hadn't thought of that. He figured since he'd told her he was never leaving me that it didn't matter that she was only *trying* to ruin my life, he wouldn't have let her. My hero!!! Keeping me safe from harm! hahaha

    And besides, she was so generously fucking him so he could save our marriage! And she didn't even want anything from him. Though I could see he was actually just ignoring her requests for more the same way he'd set himself up to need a mistress by ignoring mine -- a very small morsel of poetic justice. But ultimately how he woke the fuck up and started showing up for me.

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  20. The car i loaned her the cell phone and bills i paid the apt i put a security down on and helped her move in ... that wasnt me taking care of her or taking care of 2 households but giving her means to try and get on her feet ...find herself so i could leave get out and she could fund someone or stand on her own .... hummm.........hummmmmm hummmmm yeah ok! Weird though ow email to me prior to this comment said the same her words these items were not for me but hidden agenda bullshit to serve his purpose or boost his ego? And she wantee to me to ask him his grand gesture he was promising her???What that exactly meant im still not sure??? As i did not partake in the crazy to reply or neet her as she noted to show me all her tokens evidence and years of stuff... My view he paid dearly for sex, to keep his mistake buried and gain alot of drama because of it ... her she was paid for her services like a prostitute ... you ask me all fucking crazy ... seems 2 beoken people used each other .. created false circumstances or promises ... dive bars ... sex and drama thats what this shitty lobg term affair was made of. Like i told her she can never fill my shoes get the fuck our of our lives u marry classy and hide trashy. Now ... he admits the more he wanted out the deeper he got and when we sat down after his fog had cleared the amount of money... things and fear/stress he endured ... all his doing btw .
    . He lost a lot more then he gained and when i totalled $ he almost looked dumbfounded and said ge felt used ...even stranger ... wouldnt paying a prostitute or one night stands have been easier i think but u guess that wouldnr have ego boosting appeal .. got me really ... somethings well never understand know i guess cause we arent them and were not there.

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    1. Wounded
      I lived just like you with a dip shit that didn't have a clue how much money he spent just trying to get rid of her and keep her from telling me! He admits to buying her clothes for a job interview she told of the sexy underwear and I said to him just the cost of the viagra must have cost a fortune! Well that gave both of us a good laugh and then I just let go of caring about what he spent because like you I can see the full cost when he sees the pain return in my eyes!

      Delete
  21. After reading the facebook profile of my husbands ridiculous co-worker,I commented on the hypocritical, narcissism, apparent in every statement she made. One thing she said..that if she ever had a problem with someone..she would go to them and talk it out..( pretty hilarious. Guess she didn't have a problem with me, in order to sleep with my husband) Also, she cared so much for others,that, "she would give the shirt off her back to help someone." Vomit!! I read this to him and he actually said.. You know, I think she would. Of course I didn't understand my complete revulsion, and borderline hatred for her then.. Intuition is strong. Does anyone else feel that they just knew certain people were toxic whores? It seems that I always read about people being blindsided, and not communicating. In my case, we were having hot sex all the time, I was told that I was, "his fantasy", meanwhile, I had no problem speaking up and highlighting what a loud, overbearing,fake Christian,"lady" that he chose to " be friends" with. He was completely clear on my total dislike of her. It feels like he picked her to hurt me even more. There is no way around that fact. I feel like I was honest and forthright with my feelings and NOTHING mattered. The only things that I have read dealing with this type of person , refer to narcissist personalities.. Anyone else have these experiences?

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  22. When I asked about all the text messages I found on the phone bill (that had been deleted of course) he said "but I am a shoulder to cry on only - I would never cheat on you". When I found all the sweet FB messages confirming everything he did fess up at least but she (one of my closest friends) texted me "we only had coffee together" - right - and then "let me come round so we can get our story right" - didn't want her husband to know. I didn't meet with her I just blocked her number. She told our mutual friends that she "felt sorry for me" as my husband was "making it all up" so I look crazy. So a double set of lies for me :(

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  23. "You'd really like her"
    "She's really quiet, in fact it was awkward at first"
    "Yes, I told her she was beautiful, but I didn't
    think so at first"
    "she has her fair share of problems"

    Stupid, poor, fool. It's amazing how thirsty his ego was...scary

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  24. I just posted, but wanted to add...have been reading this blog daily for the past 3 years. Daily. Just like I think about what he did...daily. Happy to say that it's not the first thing I think of when I wake up, but I still think if it at some point during the day. DD #1 2/19/13 when the whore's boyfriend (yes, she had an affair within the affair) called me at work to clue me in. DD#3 2 months later...cause of course he needed to give her a proper good bye. It's been 3 years of trying to sort this all out...have 2 beautiful children who would be crushed if they knew--and I can't do that to them, so trying to make it work. He's trying...but some days it's so tough.
    I'm bitter and I guess just mostly sad that he didn't have the courage to tell me he was unhappy or wanted to shake things up (his was a Dom/sub relationship he found through Craigslist...that's a whole other post). I'm angry that he was so careless with my heart, my sole and my body...
    I would have never done that to him....and seriously wonder if I can ever get through this...

    Love to all the women here...you all give me strength.

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    Replies
    1. I used to ask/ beg my husband, if there was ANYTHING that we needed to talk about, that he needed to tell me, that I didn't know. Semantics was the language of choice for him, and I was trained accordingly. So far, the things that he has "confessed" were things that he was afraid that I was about to find out or that he wasn't sure that I hadn't already talked to someone and found out. He was completely happy for years to let me suffer and apologize for my unfounded jealousy.

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  25. Oh, just thought of another one:
    Hmmmmm, about 3-4 months after D-Day I made the comment, "I don't blame her"(referring to the OW) - and he says, "would you tell her that?"
    Sure, maybe tomorrow when we meet for coffe? WTF? Like I speak to her or EVER in my life want to. (Oh, and by the way, I will always and forever blame him more than her, but not long after I made that statement… I wanted to run her over in my car.)

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  26. During one of my many tirades...
    Me - Why her?
    H - She likes college football.

    Are you freaking kidding me?

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    Replies
    1. What?!?!?!? Honestly. I truly hope the OW knows that. That's what she had in her plus column. Way to go sport.

      My H said "she goes on interesting vacations." Yeah, with HER HUSBAND. Dang -- if that's what turns my H on, I'll go on an exotic vacation with HER HUSBAND any time.

      Delete
  27. My husband smashed his phone against the console of his car in a fit of anger, after I started realizing the extent of his contact with a coworker. His overreaction was an attempt to shift the blame on me because he knew I would get mad and not understand how often they spoke.. He had me tied up in guilt for years because he convinced me that I was mistreating HIM and questioning his character. He of course lied that they were only "friends" and that her husband was treating her bad, he was just being supportive.. He slept with her at her house( among many other places) in her husband's bed( while her "sorry"husband was at work) with her poor MS little boy in the other room. He would tell me stories about her bringing her child up to work, and the cute things he would say.. Great mom huh? He later told me repeatedly that he NEVER used his phone to contact her anymore. Of course he was only referring to his personal cell phone. He usually called her from his work phone on her cell phone then she called him back from her work phone.( Tell me again about transparency after you know things like this can be done..) my favorite sweet little lie is the time that I actually looked her up on Facebook because I couldn't seem to get over the contact they had beforehand (little did I know then that it had never stopped)and once I saw her picture, I called him in a rage saying that I knew he had slept with her, and how did he think I wouldn't think that someone who he talked and texted incessantly to for 2 years,(that I knew of) he hadn't slept with also.. We were in the car having this conversation, and his response was to drive me to the nearest mental health center (located across from the university I was attending) and ask if he needed to have me admitted because I was insane and not treating him well, and he was, " not going to confess to something he didn't do", it was bad enough that he made a mistake and just spoke to her because it was an ego boost he said. It is really hard to forget that this behavior happened.He also had no problem when I began medication to help me deal with being such a jealous and ungrateful person all those years,( before I found out about his affairs )At what point do you begin to believe anything they say again? I am also not sure that I buy the amount of information that he has simply, " forgotten" and of course it is not " healthy" or "moving forward" to insist on hearing everything. Especially when the last affair was supposedly over in 2008. The phone bills that I requested didn't show up until fall of 2014 after having found out in November of 2013, he had the nerve to say that he had shared to extent of their contact with me already. He really couldn't argue that (naive as I might have been when it was going on) NO WOMAN could have seen the over 1000 text and phone calls, multimedia, communication between them and NOT known that they were having an affair!!! It is sad to see a record of my intuition at that time..I would call at the exact same time during his "work" day while he was on the phone to her, he would of course get rid of me by saying how busy he was at work. They talked and texted the ENTIRE day/ days he was at work. I could go on and on..

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  28. My husband's "dumbest" comment, although there were many, came about 6 months after d day.

    He was job searching, he worked with the OW, left his job, he's a LinkedIn user, which is fine, but she was a contact. I asked him to delete her, he didn't think it was a big deal, they hadn't been talking, she just had some contacts that he might be able to use. So, I said, just add them, get rid of her....and this is what he said "it's not a dating site" my response "neither was your job you fucking idiot, bet that didn't stop you"

    Needless to say, she was no longer a contact that day.

    Rachelle

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  29. My H tried to convince me that his dates were not "physical," although they included her straddling him in the front seat of the car. "I didn't touch her." Right. I can believe that because I've never been in a car.

    Me: So she could climb over the console and straddle you without any cooperation on your part? And no physical contact whatsoever? Even when she was actually sitting on top of you?
    H: She is very petite.

    What?!?!?!? Is she a tiny magical car fairy? I call her F&*%erbell now.

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    1. I have a similar car story.. I got in the front seat of his car to ride with him after meeting him at a band concert for my boys. The seat belt strap reeked of awful perfume. I flipped out and made him change seats with me and I drove. He was quiet about my response and said that he had given his coworker a ride to go get her car at the shop.. I of course couldn't stand her( as mentioned in an earlier post) that's ok he was just being friendly. It's not like ANY of the other multiple women who worked with him could have helped her. After it all came out he swears that they weren't still having an affair when she sullied our car with her disgusting perfume.. He just didn't see any problem with still helping her out and being alone with her. Oh and they NEVER had sex in HIS car, only hers, with him in the drivers seat, her straddling him. He drew the line when it came to HIS car ( so believable ) after hearing that, the office, a public park, and another mans marriage bed were his previous spots to have sex.

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    2. Ugh, these cheaters and their car/truck sex. When I asked my H why it always happened in his truck and not her car, he reminded me that he has tinted windows.
      His truck is up for sale by the way. 😉

      Delete
  30. ...
    How can so many men think we are so f*cking dumb, gullible, whatever?? Or is it more the lies they have fed themselves in their ability to compartmentalize their cheating lives have become so plausible to themselves, that they think they must be plausible to us as well?

    My 1st of many ridiculous lies he attempted to feed me was the initial confrontation of D-Day. We had returned from a wedding and it was late, and I saw a text on his phone saying: 'I can't wait to stick my dick in you. Again.' Stupidly, I never read the rest of the thread (which he deleted then tried to tell me I must have *accidentally* deleted it myself in my rage. Really??!) He tells me that I 'was taking that text out of context'.
    ...because there are SO many ways to mis-interpret THAT one...

    ...
    Strength, Sisters. Strength.

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    1. Suzannah, I can't stand it! On what planet do women want to hear 'I can't wait to stick my dick in you.'?! So romantic. It speaks to where his brain was at. He should submit that to Hallmark, maybe they could turn it into a Valentine.

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    2. Snowbird, I know, right?!?!
      Lol, Hallmark is missing out. :D

      In all seriousness, you are absolutely right...it DOES speak to where his brain was at.
      Sigh...

      Hope you are in a better place than last we posted together.
      ((hugs))

      Delete
    3. I guess some of these women aren't turned off by it in the least. I'm still shocked that the romantic lead up to my H receiving oral sex for the first time from his OW was "I want you to suck my dick." And she went right to it. I guess no pleasantries were needed.
      Ugh!

      Delete
    4. Hugs to you too, Suzannah. And ugh is right, Dandelion! Let's add that one to our trashy Valentine collection. We can draw a big heart around it with glitter glue. A friend said about ow, "It made her feel powerful." I agree, but any woman flattered by these is beyond desperate. Once he zips up, she's sad and alone again. No need to lower your gaze, warriors. Just keep walking, eyes straight ahead.

      Delete
    5. "No need to lower your gaze, warriors. Just keep walking, eyes straight ahead."

      Well said, Snowbird. Well said!

      And yes, Dandelion, UGH!

      Delete
  31. Elle,

    Please, oh, please make this a permanent section in your blog. This is great medicine for me! It somehow grounds me and lessens my pain when I realize how ridiculous they all are. At least I can hold my head high knowing I am not an idiot!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I wasn't going to post this, but I can't resist.
    Since she also falls in the cheater category, not only with my husband but also on her own husband...
    Posted as the OW's cover photo on Facebook, an inspirational quote reading, "Some day you'll look back and know exactly why it happened."
    Ummm... pretty sure it happened because you're a whore.

    ReplyDelete
  33. On D day, he told me he'd made a terrible mistake - he would never leave me for her. I was devastated regardless. The next day I asked how she took the news it was over. He told me he hadn't told her yet because he didn't want to ruin her weekend. My life was in shreds, and he didn't want to ruin the unethical one's weekend! Funnily he ruined it about 5 minutes later...

    ReplyDelete
  34. "But she's had a hard life"

    ReplyDelete
  35. "Her husband was a real piece of work"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anoymous April 7
      M
      I heard that one too! Her h was very controlling! I then pointed out how she was manipulating that relationship just like she did with him! She was the one that lost her family due to her choice to cheat many times! My h knew he wasn't her first attempt to get away from her h. Men are dumber than dirt! Almost all think with the brain between their legs!

      Delete
    2. The poor women that my husband went for usually had, "mean" husbands, or boyfriends. He told me that they had been abused, and he was just offering advice. I was furious at the irony. What " advice" could HE possibly give them.. He stuttered around and finally said that he told the latest target, (whose husband drank too much)that she didn't deserve to be treated the way she had told him she was being treated and that she didn't have to put up with being disrespected. Isn't that sweet?! Especially coming from a man who had sexually, verbally, and mentally abused his wife for YEARS.

      Delete
    3. For weeks, I watched ow stand too close and talk too long on the sidelines. She wouldn't be that bold, right? I defended her to the other mommies -- they're just old friends, catching up. I tell h to knock it off. H: "I feel really bad, she's going through a terrible divorce." Me: "Of course she is." I back off. She invites h to see her new (half-mil -- FML!) condo, and oh no, his penis accidentally lands in her vagina. He says he never saw it coming. These vaginas, they keep coming out of nowhere! In cars, in trucks, in luxury condos! Forget the who/what/where, warriors... they're all the same. Thank you for making me laugh.

      Delete
    4. Thank you for making me laugh! I needed this tonight.

      Delete
  36. When I asked the OW why she called our house? OW: I wanted to see if you were ok, it all happened so suddenly.

    "I thought I could get her to find a boyfriend on dating web sites then I would rid of her. Not much of a plan I guess"

    "She couldn't find a boyfriend, no man was good enough for her."

    " She was her at our house and farm but I didn't bring her to the boat, that was our special place."

    ReplyDelete
  37. "The affair last 8 months, no 10 months, no 18 months well it was 2.5 years"

    "She just expected me to do those things, wine, lunch, coffee, dinner."

    "I felt sorry for her, Parkensons is a terrible disease. She had a walker but I never saw her use it."

    ReplyDelete
  38. Lynn Laughing PainApril 8, 2016 at 6:28 AM

    "See we found our we don't have to wait until the weekend to have sex." My reply: "You didn't, you had sex Mon-Wed for 2 years".

    You have to laugh! They re-write the story - the justifications are so, well it is stupidity on steroids.

    ReplyDelete
  39. I have to make myself stop. The OW had a hip replacement. After she got home I asked how long before she could have sex? "She gave me a blow job."

    ReplyDelete
  40. I found out my husband was cheating the beginning of October 2015. With a married woman with five kids. He said they never met outside of work, not that he didn't ask but she always had a reason not to. So goes down to him having an emotional affair .... Texting all day into the night ... Calling when ever he could. He totally was chasing and wanting her. I saw the text messages and he was so bestowing his love for her etc. this start d around 3 years ago , then he said it stopped and started up again maybe a year ago. Doesn't mater it's all messed up. The lies , secrets, betrayal, the resentment, anger, hurt, shame, the list is endless. I texted her when I found out. He said he hasn't spoken to her , hasn't had any contact with her since the day prior to me texting her. The pain is so raw. I go to counseling and we started going again as a couple.. We were going to counseling together as he was chasing her sorry ass. I don't know what to do. But if I hear one more time from the therapist about forgiveness and letting go of the anger I'm going to scream!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Joy, I hear you about the forgiveness/anger. I'm about 6 months ahead of you. I was really struggling with this a few months ago. I wanted a way to "fix" everything asap, and I felt like the message from therapy and books and my religion was that I had to forgive and get past my anger. But I just could not / would not and the idea was making me even angrier.

      But I'm actually doing okay with this now (for now).

      I got a lot of help from the women on this site -- so keep reading and reading.

      Also, because I'm Catholic, I went to reconciliation to confess that I did not want to forgive and was so angry that I had stopped praying. I thought I'd get the usual -- a disappointed sigh and 3 Hail Marys :). Instead, the priest talked about the pain of betrayal and how it really messes with who we think we are. He didn't tell me I needed to forgive, or even stop being angry -- he didn't go there at all. Instead, for my "penance" he told me to say every morning "Father, help me to be the beautiful woman you made me to be." Corny, but it has been a powerful. I hear in it a message of self-worth and possibility and rising above. And it actually has led me towards forgiveness and less intense anger, despite my best intentions to never ever let it go :) So no matter your religion or none, I encourage you to find a message of true love for yourself and repeat it daily -- it seems the rest may follow. Hope this helps!

      Delete
    2. Thank you for sharing this, Sal. So powerful, such grace. Someone once told me it's okay to be mad, He can take it. Hugs & prayers to both of you.

      Delete
    3. Yes, thank you, Sal.
      I am agnostic, but your experience in reconciliation helped me also.

      Delete
  41. I asked my niw ex fiance how he could do this to me AGAIN (2nd x with a married women) after everything we've been through...and his response was "Well...I guess you fell for it"...I moved out the next day...and we have our 2nd child due in a week and not sure how I feel about even letting him in the delivery room at this point!

    ReplyDelete
  42. I asked my h if he ever considered that she could expose him to a STD his response was "Well she's been celibate for 11 years" Hello!!!! HIV herpes among others are for life

    ReplyDelete
  43. 22,000 + text messages in 2 months... "We're just friends bullshitting"

    ReplyDelete
  44. My other fav he told her

    "You make me want to be the kind of man I should be"

    As he's cheating...

    ReplyDelete
  45. After seeing pages of text messages back and forth between my husband and his coworker, while she was attending a company class, I was upset. He half ass tells her that I don't like the amount of contact they are having. Her response, that he needed to, " get a handle on that!" ( imagine this said in the most ridiculous hillbilly country voice you can ) meaning that he should be able to speak to anyone, anytime he wants.. No problem with that unless it leads,to soul crushing betrayal, right?!! Oops that is exactly what happened!!! These woman would not be ok if some other woman was calling and texting THEIR husband incessantly!! Guess they realized how wrong it really was at some point and decided to get alternate email addresses to hide their communication. I am going to contact her husband with the phone bills soon and " get a handle on things" myself😃

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My husband was using the app whatapp , the texts supposedly don't appear on the cell phone bill

      Delete
    2. Mine switched to FB messaging and then deleting the messages as soon as they were sent/received after I mentioned the large number of texts between them. On the texts he said "but I would never cheat on you." And the classic "she's going through a rough patch." The creepy thing is she then started texting his BROTHER and they also started exchanging intimate texts. WTF!?

      Delete
    3. @ Shelley: Oh my goodness...and I thought my H's 8600 texts to his extracurricular dalliances in one month was bad...
      "Just friends bullshitting", huh??

      Just crazy...

      Delete
  46. OMG Shelley! Did either of them do anything else besides text? My h did most of his texting to her while he was at work ... and used to bitch hiw his co-workers didn't pull their weight! Really?
    And yes ... the kind of man ...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, it turned iut they had a full blown affair. It's been 2 months since she told me. I got photos, screenshots of messages.

      It was a nightmare.

      Our relationship was in a bad place at the time. Not excusing anything...just saying...,I started to see a huge change in him....he started saying he doesn't understand how we lost each other Andre wanted to fix us... and a week later she told me (Facebook messenger). Was mainly "he doesn't love you he loves me crap"

      He says he finally woke up and ended it.. And that's why she told me. He said he started trying to a few weeks back but she would threaten to tell me.,,

      I told him to leave initially but he refused saying we had been broken and while it didn't excuse anything, he would do whatever it took.

      And while I still cry most days, the fact he choose to end it and he clearly choose me.. It's helped me get thru the days..

      Strangely, at least in my case, it's totally turned things around. So it's still been a nightmare and I can't say if we will make it... For now, he's clearly trying to find our way back...

      We barely spoke before. Slept in separate beds. First week we did nothing but talk and cry. And some screaming and yelling,., but slowly it feels like we are getting back to the connection we once had.

      Still so far to go and I do fear I'll never trust again...

      But he at least went from passwords on everything to giving me all his passwords.

      Small steps.

      Finding your way back is hard...

      Delete
  47. Yes, I look back on " how stressed" he would complain about being at his job. What a laugh.. I would actually try to build him up to make him feel better. I told him once that he was too nice to the women he worked with,( because he was basically their bitch, doing any and everything for them( RED FLAGS!!!) and they ran over him and made him do their job) Such a good guy right? Would be easier to believe if he was actually doing HIS job instead of trying and succeeding in getting in to at least two howorkers pants, with a couple more he was working on when it came out..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That has to be hard when they work together... Cause we need our jobs.. So not as easy to just cut contact.

      Delete
  48. My husband would go and pay and be her errand boy.. I would question why he was doing that and he would say she lives so faraway it's no big deal!!! If I only push d harder

    ReplyDelete
  49. Latest make me laugh words, don't blame her so much. I had been thinking about an affair for years... I said right back I blame her for not backing off and her cruelty to me! He grew quiet but understood.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Every time there was an argument and she came up, he'd say "leave her out of it, this is between us" really? Maybe you should have left your dick out of her..
      They really are so stupid!

      Rachelle

      Delete
  50. "Oh, I didn't cheat on you until 6 years in to our marriage. Except for that back room stripper. But it was just that one time, I didn't think it was a big deal". Seriously? When you pay extra so the "stripper" gets you off, you didn't think it was cheating?

    ReplyDelete
  51. Since mine fucked some trash that he still works with, he told me to go and fuck some guy at my work and then he would know how I felt. OMG, they are truly truly lost....

    ReplyDelete
  52. We really do need a book of quotes, comments and lies...Another awesome quote "she told me how bad she felt that this was going on and that she was doing this to you". So since you both felt bad you just continued the affair to feel better?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anoymous
      My h also told me about how bad she felt about the adultry because she was so religious....but it took him almost two years to get rid of the stupid b:$ch! Still smh!

      Delete
  53. Haha Theresa, the sad part is that they believed them and then they expect us to believe it and swallow that garbage. It's amazing, thinking of all of the crap that he actually said to me about his whore-worker. They really are screwed up.

    ReplyDelete
  54. I haven't been on in such a long time, so I was catching up and this post caught my eye. I was laughing so hard at some of these- which certainly weren't funny when they happened, I'm sure. I have two- Me: What is going on with ___? Why are you on the phone with her at 5:30 in the morning and all day and night? Him: There's nothing going on. I'm only helping her with her work and her family. (Then I truly discovered the 17 pages of calls and texts in one month (turns out that was a light month)...and that he fell asleep on the phone with her while he was out of town like some high school kid in love- give me a break!)
    My second is asking him why he was buying her VS lingerie when I was wearing "normal" things. Answer: I thought she needed some nice things. (I laugh at this now, but then...that was the day I learned what the saying hell hath no fury like a woman scorned really meant.)
    Oh, dear....
    C.

    ReplyDelete
  55. I have a good one. My husband decided to have an affair with one of my close friends. I found tons of teenage love texts and FB messages plus a hotel receipt. Spouse broke it off and my "friend" (also married with kids like me) denied everything. She sent an email round to all our friends:
    "I have kept quiet about the X and Y situation as I have knowledge of other indiscretions of his that X doesn't, and I don't wish to add to her pain.Y and I exchanged messages mostly mundane stuff........I have NEVER EVER on any occasion slept with him. It pains me to think that anyone would think that I could do that to X......Please don't reply to this email as the less stuff on my computer about this fucking mess the better."
    Crazy eh? And yes some friends stopped talking to me. Most were very supportive though. It was a total nightmare.

    ReplyDelete
  56. I found out that my cheating husband had bought and read "Bang" and "Day Bang" books by Roosh - pick up manuals if you don't know them as the titles say. When I asked him why since he was married he said that he wanted to see what he had missed in his youth....

    ReplyDelete
  57. After the second round of honesty about my husband's affairs, I decided to contact a "lady" that worked in another of the company's offices to ask her some questions... What I was most curious about was her take on the innocent fax that she had sent him that was written like a sexual fantasy/ encounter, between two coworkers. She, of course filling the role of the dominate aggressor. This was after they had discussed the book, 50 shades of grey, and both had deemed it too tame. They also confided that they had both cheated on their spouses. Kind of bragged about that fact actually. This woman was so delusional that she unabashedly explained to me that they were just friends discussing their lives, and that she didn't see how discussing the mechanics of tying up and fucking a coworker could be seen as flirty or anything. Really?!!! She was working on her marriage now, she told me.. Her poor husband!

    ReplyDelete
  58. The things our h's will say to sugar coat it. My H tells me I don't know why you want to read that stuff and do that to yourself!! It's only going to make it worse, and hurts you! Really!! First off, If I recall I didn't have a choice in you having an affair!! And if you were so worried about hurting me you would have been f***ing another woman and telling her how you were so in love with her! He says he didn't love her he knew he didn't. He knew he loved me and wanted to be with me...he just was caught up in it!! He thought about ending it in his head! WTF!!

    ReplyDelete
  59. After DD I wanted to contact OW's husband and let him know what was going on.My h said not to because they were going on vacation with their kids and it would ruin their trip!My life was in complete chaos but heaven forbid her vacation might be ruined!

    ReplyDelete
  60. And I quote. " She doesn't like confrontation"

    ReplyDelete
  61. D-day may 2016. "It started in the winter" um yeah winter TWO&aHALF fucking YEARS ago. Lol. Asshole.

    ReplyDelete
  62. I got a couple of keepers today. The same one that everyone else has gotten, an oldie but a goodie.

    "I didn't think it was going to directly impact us."

    I also liked that apparently going out to meet with her in a non-affair way "I know it gave you anxiety attacks but I thought if you got over me then it would mean you really wanted to be with me. Not that you just wanted me around to stop your anxiety." Uh, because I just said I love you and want to work this out for entertainment?!

    And my favorite was when he decided to prove to me what a nice guy he is by telling me, "I'm awake every 30 mins right now having nightmares about her needing my help and me not being there."

    YES! That was REALLY good! Tell me about how much she needs you. Because reminding me of the OW and her issues makes me really feel good.

    Can I just run him over yet?!

    ReplyDelete
  63. "I'm scared knowing that I connected with someone on all the parts that seemed to be missing and the rest of relationship things are relatively easy."

    All the things missing in the relationship were "more sex".

    He found compatibility and someone he could spend his life with on the first try because all the missing components were there. And the OTHER stuff in a relationship is EASY! Of course! Because finding a damaged OW that will give you sex because you are" the nicest person she's ever met" as compared to her abusive husband was the HARD part! Living with someone every single day for a decade and building a life together, that's the easy stuff. Maybe if I go out and have sex with a rando I'll have a perfect life now too.

    ReplyDelete

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