I just came across this Club by Elle via an article on infidelity. Read through several posts and comments.
You are all amazing just the way you are. We don't need validation from our unfaithful spouse. Nobody says marriage is a bed of roses. It is HARD WORK but when the going gets tough, we didn't escape reality by having affairs and dishonoring our wedding vows. That's why it hurts so much when we found out about their affairs. Hope I'm making sense here.
I posted about my situation last night (I'm from the other side of the globe, this the time difference). I'm in the state where I discovered his year long affair (could be longer, may not be the first one too) about a week ago, and I'm now in the midst of planning of how to go about confronting him, asking myself what I really want, etc. Any advice?
I believe that most of us, when we married, there was mutual love and respect between us. However, over time, the daily grinds of life, the demands imposed on us from all aspects of our lives, we start losing sight of who we are, stop loving ourselves as we gave more and more of ourselves to our family, our spouse/kids, leaving little/none for ourselves. It is a wonder/ miracle that we haven't gone bonkers! Gotta find back ourselves and start loving ourselves. Any insight to how to go about doing it?
Remember, we don't need others to validate ourselves. Only we have the right to do that.
Reading and posting here is very therapeutic. Like a lifeline for me to pull myself out of my despair and negative thoughts! We know we are not alone in this painful journey towards healing. Happiness is easy to share but pain/hurt is difficult and at times, near impossible to share. Nobody can truly understand your pain except yourself even though we experienced similar type of betrayal from our spouse. Thus, I believe we have to confront this pain before true healing can take place and eventually, closure. Over time, it becomes a scar instead of the initial open wound. A constant reminder of what has had happened but not painful to the touch unlike a fresh, open wound. Read this somewhere in this blog.
Stay strong ladies! Like the old adage goes: what don't kill you, makes you stronger!!! & keep fighting for your happiness! We deserve no less.
Last but not least, Many many thanks to Elle for founding this Club!!!
Dear All,
ReplyDeleteI just came across this Club by Elle via an article on infidelity. Read through several posts and comments.
You are all amazing just the way you are. We don't need validation from our unfaithful spouse. Nobody says marriage is a bed of roses. It is HARD WORK but when the going gets tough, we didn't escape reality by having affairs and dishonoring our wedding vows. That's why it hurts so much when we found out about their affairs. Hope I'm making sense here.
I posted about my situation last night (I'm from the other side of the globe, this the time difference).
I'm in the state where I discovered his year long affair (could be longer, may not be the first one too) about a week ago, and I'm now in the midst of planning of how to go about confronting him, asking myself what I really want, etc. Any advice?
I believe that most of us, when we married, there was mutual love and respect between us. However, over time, the daily grinds of life, the demands imposed on us from all aspects of our lives, we start losing sight of who we are, stop loving ourselves as we gave more and more of ourselves to our family, our spouse/kids, leaving little/none for ourselves. It is a wonder/ miracle that we haven't gone bonkers!
Gotta find back ourselves and start loving ourselves. Any insight to how to go about doing it?
Remember, we don't need others to validate ourselves. Only we have the right to do that.
Reading and posting here is very therapeutic. Like a lifeline for me to pull myself out of my despair and negative thoughts! We know we are not alone in this painful journey towards healing. Happiness is easy to share but pain/hurt is difficult and at times, near impossible to share. Nobody can truly understand your pain except yourself even though we experienced similar type of betrayal from our spouse. Thus, I believe we have to confront this pain before true healing can take place and eventually, closure. Over time, it becomes a scar instead of the initial open wound. A constant reminder of what has had happened but not painful to the touch unlike a fresh, open wound. Read this somewhere in this blog.
Stay strong ladies! Like the old adage goes: what don't kill you, makes you stronger!!! & keep fighting for your happiness! We deserve no less.
Last but not least, Many many thanks to Elle for founding this Club!!!